On this rarest of Leap Days, the soccer world brings us a full slate of international friendlies to feast on like hungry tourists at a casino buffet. So pull up a chair and grab a plate. Of course, most of you will pop in here this afternoon for that special occasion when Italian Americans everywhere get to feel conflicted and torn. But the international action has been underway since yesterday, when the Serbs dispatched the Armenians and Own Goal suited up for Bosnia to give Brazil a last gasp undeserved win. There was even a match between New Zealand and Jamaica in the middle of the night.
About the Battle for the Heart of Jersey, both countries are missing significant players tonight, which makes it a bit harder to predict the outcome. Prandelli’s Prancers will be missing Cassano and Il Traditore through injury, as well as Balotelli and Osvaldo for breaking the manager’s code of conduct. Something called Fabio Borini could start for the Azzurri up front. Meanwhile, Klinsy will have to make do without Donovan (who’s busy tweeting about puppies while he copes with bronchitis), Chandler, and Torres. Those losses resulted in a free trip to Italy for Kljestan and Brek Shea.
Here’s a brief list of today’s most interesting internationals (all times Eastern). You can find a full slate including AFC qualifiers here. As always, feel free to post lineups in the comments as they’re announced and do some pre-game trash talk.
09:00 Cyprus v. Serbia (wait, didn’t they just beat Armenia yesterday?)
12:00 Canada v. Armenia (wait, didn’t they just lose to Serbia yesterday?)
13:30 Uruguay v. Romania
14:30 Argentina v. Switzerland
14:45 USA v. Italy
14:45 Germany v. France
14:45 Poland v. Portugal
14:45 Ireland v. Czech Republic
14:45 Scotland v. Slovenia
15:00 England v. Netherlands
15:30 Spain v. Venezuela
20:00 Mexico v. Colombia
Still don’t know how to insert .gifs or video, but this:
Bahrain are currently dickstomping Indonesia 10 – 0. And they’ve missed two of their four penalties.
@Lorber: if I understand correctly, Bahrain needed to make up a 9 goal deficit in group E. I suspect some Indonesians have walked away from this match with briefcases full of oily cash.
In any case, it didn’t do any good as Bahrain were eliminated anyway because Qatar drew with Iran.
That Bahrain result is absurd. In a corruption-off, I’d have picked Qatar for sure (and they ended up coming through, by telling Iran to let them score if they want to receive payment for any oil or future American hikers/hostages). But Bahrain made it damn interesting. My guess is that the Saudis bankrolled their corruption effort in an attempt to tell Qatar and Iran to go fuck themselves (or however you say that in Arabic). Just like the Saudis bankrolled the Bahrainis’ tank-stomping of the resistance movement a year ago. Somewhere, Sunil Gulati and the Australian FA Pres are weeping that Qatar will actually host a freaking WC.
Apparently Bahrain is going through some shit, so corruption makes a lot of sense here.
For the sake of my wallet, I hope none of these countries tries to block the Straits of Hormuz over this.
Not sure if this has been mentioned, but Del Bosque dropped Torres.
Italy Lineup (4-3-1-2): Buffon; Criscito, Barzagli, Ogbonna, Maggio; Nocerino, Pirlo, Marchisio; Thiago Motta; Giovinco, Matri
United States Lineup (4-2-3-1): Howard; Johnson, Bocanegra, Goodson, Cherundolo; Bradley, Edu; Shea, Dempsey, Williams; Altidore
Argentina (4-4-2): Messi +10 (Romero; Campagnaro, Fernández, Garay, Zabaleta; Sosa, Mascherano, Braña, Maxi Rodríguez; Agüero)
Switzerland (4-5-1): Benaglio; Affolter, Senderos, Rodriguez, Lichtsteiner; Dzemaili, Frei, Inler, Xhaka, Shaqiri; Mehmedi
Will someone please give Mascherano a career-ending already? Jesus I hate that guy…
So, which meaningless matchup is more interesting? US-Italy, or England-Holland? Will Stuart Pearce deliver, or will England sink into the ocean?!?
England v Holland because all of the handwringing that will follow the England loss.
TFA – ‘handwringing’ is putting it mildly, I think.
By the way, could we see England come out with a 4-5-2?? Pearce has tried it before…
Stevie G starting over Carrick. Brilliant.
Carrick wasn’t even called up. Which is a travesty. Should be Parker-Carrick-Gerrard in midfield. Instead, Barrys playing the anchor which makes no sense, and Parker’s playing more advanced, which makes no sense.
So, these US jerseys. Pretty ugly, huh?
Right. I was anti-Carrick for two years but he’s been incredible this season and I’ve finally converted.
When did Italy turn Thiago Motto into an Italian? How did I miss that? Such bullshit.
We went from gorgeous jerseys to these? Eek.
MESSI GOOOOOOL
I do like England’s kit. The collar is a bit odd, but otherwise it’s nice and clean.
Altidore is playing like garbage. You’re fucking huge man, don’t get pushed off the ball that easily
JT moderating the ESPN Soccer chatroom.
http://espn.go.com/sports/soccer/story/_/id/7626756/us-vs-italy
He hasn’t published a single one of my comments. Charlie Big Potatoes all of a sudden.
Just glad we haven’t conceded yet. Anyone found any photos or screengrabs so I can see the kits in question? Stuck at work; speaking of which, I want to beat my co’s IT Dep’t with a brick stick. They suck a lot.
For your viewing (dis)pleasure:
Azzurri perspective: Giovinco looks spritely, Good pressure from wingbacks, gotta be careful on US free kicks
USA: Credit to Bradley for closing down Pirlo in the final third, Need to stay strong at the back, but that limits their attacking potential.
I assume we’re wearing aways? If so, I found them online. I don’t actually hate the shirts, but I think they’d be much better with red socks. Even better with white shorts, but I know we can’t really do that, given that France think they own the blue white red thing (and Scotland too). Interested to see what the home whites will look like.
http://www.ussoccerstore.com/us00m112512aa.html
One thing I wll say, is that it was probably too much to do the white sleeves and the sash. Let’s stick to one signature design element at a time, Nike. I for one am fine keeping the sash as our thing, as almost no one else uses it. But enough of this tonal bullshit. Either use it and make it obvious and classy, or don’t use it, but don’t apologize for using it by trying to make it unnoticeable.
Those sleeves suck balls.
From an actual football perspective, I thought the whole point of Klinsy was to be more expressive and counterattacking instead of just parking the bus and lumping it long every now and then like Bradley. I’d rather go down 3-0 to Italy and actually have the guys learning and implementing the style than going all damage-control and wasting an international date while we try to lose less badly than we would’ve anyway.
Anyone see the Gerrard injury? JT says it’s just a little knock and that he walked it off, but is there reason for more concern? I need something to panic about ahead of this matchup between seventhpool and fifthsenal
Can you even see the sash on TV other than in a closeup?
OM just noted this on Twitter, but this is hilarious from Eboue-
“Congrat to #ScottParker. A true gentleman & living Legend. Not arrogant, doesnt sleep wiv his mates wife and call players black cunt.”
@Scouse – that’s Fourthsenal to you, thanks very much. There’s a “trophy” for fourth, didn’t you know?
Wow, Eboue sticking it right where Johnny-T likes it…square up the butt.
@Lorber: Give ‘im beans!
DEUCE!!!!!
then you go and do something like this…..AND TOTALLY REDEEM YOURSELF!
@Scouse: That eboue account is fake.
Deuce is loose.
I’m an idiot
Deuce is the man. Composed layoff from Jozy as well. Just hoooooooooollllllllllllllllld it now
Deuce FTW! Come on you Yanks!
Not sure if the short, brown haired Italians are accentuating it, but Brek Shea looks like a human banana.
England collapse and the Dutch bang in two in quick succession. Smalling may or may not be dead after clashing heads with The Hunter.
MESSI WOO
Argentina 2 Swiss 1
SPECTOR SIGHTING!
Both of Leo’s goals were vintage Messi. Great to see him playing like this for Argentina.
MESSI HAT TRICK!!!!
penno
@TheLorber: You see dead people?
How much would Brazil hate it if the Argies win the WC in Brazil? What do you guys think the odds are of that?
OOOOOSAAAAH!
@KC Gunner: The Brazilians would be very, very upset. But I really hope Argentina lets Brazil and Spain carry the load of being favorites. Let’s fly as low under the radar as we can (which isn’t very low when you have Messi, I know).
Wow Ashley Young levels in stoppage time
Holy shit Robben makes it 3-2 immediately.
That Robben goal was a beaut. Such a classy little touch.
Robben goal was a beaut, but where was the defending?
Well, Cahill’s goal probably shouldn’t have counted anyways, so I guess the result ended where it should have.