You can’t be champion of Argentina unless you celebrate in your underpants.

…of Argentina, natch. Lowly Arsenal de Sarandí clinched their first national title ever yesterday with a win over Belgrano and a little help from neighbors Independiente, who held Tigre to a draw. Tigre didn’t mind losing out on the silverware, however, because the point was enough to help them avoid a relegation playoff. Boca Juniors faded at the finish, getting spanked 3-1 by All Boys because they sent a bunch of reserves out to play. The starters are being rested for Wednesday’s Copa Libertadores final versus Corinthians.

Olimpo and Banfield (who won a title as recently as ’09) were relegated directly, while San Lorenzo and San Martin will go into the relegation playoffs against Instituto and Rosario Central, respectively. Meanwhile, River Plate and Quilmes were promoted. That’s right folks, River is back!

A hearty congratulations to El Arse on their first title! This concludes my coverage of Tango Ball. I’m planning to still bring you, my faithful reader, some kind of news from South America in the fall, but likely in a different format.