Welcome to Four Five Two’s third-world class coverage of Euro 2012. We are taking an in-depth look at the 16 teams who kick off play Friday afternoon. If we feel ambitious we may even have some other articles up. As always we will also provide predictions so you can make fun of us for being completely wrong. We close our previews with Group D, or the Group Nobody Likes.
Quite simply, nobody except for the countries’ inhabitants likes any of the teams in Group D, with the exception of Sweden. England will continue to self-flagellate about the “Spirit of ’66,” while really embracing the Spirit of ’50, when the Mighty Magyars gave the Brits a lesson in football, and England conveniently put the blinders on, and will also count England’s Brave Racist John Terry among its number. France will continue to have International Douchebag Princes Franck Ribery and Patrice Evra, no matter how much more likeable Le President is than Starchild Domenech. Ukraine might not be weak, but it is certainly racist. And something something Swedish Bikini Team joke.
With the easy jokes out of the way, let’s get to the teams, in alphabetical order. Allons-y! Continue reading